16 Tons...of Mushroom

This morning I got to work, took out my computer, and sat down at my desk with a sigh. Another day, another dollar, thought I. Hold on, I'm not earning any dollars?! (another sigh) - and cue the Tennessee Ernie Ford tune - ...another day older and deeper in debt. Yikes.

It's funny how these types of epiphanies happen. It must have been 14 years since I first heard that song. I was maybe 10 years old. I had to sing it with my class for one of those elementary school musical programs. Of course, it had no meaning back then, nor has it, until today (another sigh).

It's all good though. In some way, sometime in the not-too-distant future, it will pay off; like eating pickled mushrooms.

Pickled mushrooms are a traditional Latvian (so they tell me) snack usually eaten along with little smoked sausages and cheese and crackers - you know, picnic snacks. When a co-worker of mine brought in a bowl of pickled mushrooms for a little, happy hour get-together my curiosity was perked. I was pleasantly surprised - they were actually really good.

Now these pickled mushrooms are about the size of a normal small-sized mushroom. Logically, if they are that size after the pickling, they had to be WAY bigger before the pickling (at least...3 times bigger!). So either the mushrooms are just naturally humongous mushrooms or they are genetically modified humongous mushrooms. Or, they are grown near Chernobyl, which is not too far from here, and they are both naturally AND genetically modified humongous mushrooms. My bet is on the last one.

What does this have to do with capitalizing on my dividends? I will tell you. Because these mushrooms were grown near Chernobyl, and were thus both naturally AND genetically modified humongous mushrooms, some of their natural and genetically modified nutrients will pass on to me and in the not-too-distant future I might sprout a third eye, or a third arm. Talk about beneficial; with an extra bodily amenity, think how much more productive I will be!